Nun of That (2009, Review)
Directed By: Richard Griffin
Cast: Sarah Nicklin, Alexandra Cipolla, Shanette Wilson, Ruth Sullivan, Rich Tretheway, Brandon Luis Aponte, Michael Reed, Debbie Rochon, Lloyd Kaufman
Camp Motion Pictures / NTSC Region 1 / Unrated / 16×9 Widescreen / Dolby Digital Stereo / 93 minutes / PURCHASE
“Thats one helluva NUN!”
For the most part nunsploitation is associated with naughty nuns locked away in convents and worshipping their sapphic desires. The sub-genre conjures up images of big-breasted, lusty sisters giving in to their most carnal desires and blaspheming wherever and whenever possible. Satan worship, lesbianism, fucking priests, fucking demons, fucking themselves, S&M; they do it all and it’s the backbone of nunsploitation. But what of violence? Ass-kicking, no-guns or guts-barred ultra-violence? There aren’t many action-horror nun exploitation movies to speak of – the only one that comes to mind in Killer Nun (aka Suor Omicidi, 1978). But add to the action-horror aspect a slap-stick comedy element complete with a throwback “grindhouse” mentality and you’ve pretty much whittled down the list to one flick; Nun of That.
Troubled nun Sister Kelly Johnson (Sarah Nicklin who looks like Leelee Sobieski’s hot sister) is thrown out of her convent for violent behavior and is gunned down by a trio of nuns in an alleyway after being attacked by – and killing – some thugs who tried to rape her. She wakes up in the afterlife only to be told by a singing and dancing Jesus that she is being given a second chance of sorts by becoming part of the “Order of the Black Habit” – a group of nuns that act as enforcers for the Catholic church. She has been rechristened “Sister Wrath” to join the other members who are also named after the seven deadly sins. Their next mission is to kill every one of the “Big Mama Rizzo” crime family. When some of Mama’s boys start turning up murdered, she hires “Viper Goldstein”, the meanest and most efficient black Jewish assassin money can buy and his associates the Bronowitz Brothers (who are masters in Jew-Jitsu) to hunt down the killer nuns and take them out.
Nun of That is an absurdly hysterical and uber-violent nunsploitation action-horror-comedy that is a ton of fun to watch. Nun puns, a pop music singing Christ, a tranny mob boss, a black Jewish assassin with “Star of David” throwing stars, nuns praying to God for cock… it’s all just so blasphemous, wrong and funny as shit. My favorite quote had to be “You’re so unlucky you could fall into a barrel of tits and come out sucking your thumb!”. Oh, the humanity! Writer/director Richard Griffin mixed all of these genres without making a mess of the story or being annoying with forced jokes. The CGI effects were awful which added to the goofy good time but the make-up was pretty damn good for such a movie and there was lots of blood and gore to show it off. The only gripe I have is the lack of tits. Yes, there is one shower scene with a nice pair, but that’s it in the bare breast department. In a over-the-top romp like this, I want more bOObahs! Even when the nuns were getting it on, they did it with their clothes on… DAMMIT!
Camp Motion Picture and Scorpio Film Releasing have done the world of cinematic sinners a favor with this release. There aren’t enough new nunsploitation films coming out. Especially ones that are a lot of fun to watch. This is definitely multiple-watch DVD. It’s one that I could pop in anytime and have a blast every time. It would especially be a great party movie to have on in the background while you are getting shit-faced and throwing up in the potted plants. The disk video quality is great but the audio is a little low and muffled throughout. The DVD extras include a “making of” featurette called “Breaking the Habit”, commentaries by the filmmaker and cast, and exploitation trailer vault and a great four minute short film on which the feature-length film was based also called Nun of That. It has some of the same characters but it’s a very different plot based on the same idea shot in a trailer-type format. Pick this disk up from Alternative Cinema and count your blessings when you do.
