Ricco the Mean Machine (1973)

aka Cauldron of Death
aka Gangland
aka Mean Machine
aka Ricco
aka The Dirty Mob

Director: Tulio Demicheli

Cast: Christopher Mitchum, Barbara Bouchet, Malisa Longo, Arthur Kennedy

Dark Sky Films / Color / Unrated / Widescreen 1.78:1 / NTSC R1 / 94 minutes / Purchase: @ DiabolikDVD.com

After 2 years in prison Ricco Aversi (Mitchum) is released and on a path of vengeance. His father, the head of a mafia family, is gunned down by the ambitious Don Vito and Ricco is looking to settle the score. He soon finds out that Vito didn’t just kill his dad, he stole his girlfriend as well (Longo). With the help of his father’s friends and a hot con-artist (Bouchet), Ricco plans to take down the family and find the person who pulled the trigger.

When you push the mafia, they push back. After the avenging son steals a large amount of diamonds and cash from Don Vito, the Don decides to up the ante and flush him out. He decides to go with what he knows will work; he kills the rest of Ricco’s family. And it works, too well. It pisses him off and turns him into “the Mean Machine” and Ricco comes gunning for the Don with all barrels blazing!

Christopher, the son of Robert Mitchum, plays the titular character about as wooden as you could without being a fucking tree. I don’t think he changed his expression or his body language once in the movie. During the fight scenes he looked like a scrawny stick-figure karate chopping full-grown men. After learning of the reputation of this movie and seeing the DVD cover, I was expecting a buff badass who was going to dismantle the mob. The title is just too silly, “Mean Machine” he is not. “Really Perturbed Girly-Man” perhaps?

I honestly don’t see why this movie has such fanfare among Italian cult movie lovers. It’s billed as “ultra-violent” but I think the far more “mainstream” Good Fellas was a much more brutal film. Yeah, there is the much talked about switchblade castration, which I must say is nasty, but overall it isn’t much more violent than the action movies of today if at all. A rifle butt to the face here, an acid bath there, it was only violent in small increments that didn’t really flow with the rest of the cheese-filled movie.

I can’t deny that it was fun in some parts. The 2 beautiful women in Ricco’s life are stunning. Bouchet is a favorite of most, but for me Longo is one of the most beautiful women I have seen in any movie. Bouchet does a nice striptease but Longo has the nicest nipples on record (I checked the Nicest Nipples with Guinness). And I did enjoy the few violent scenes wholeheartedly. I guess the hype just disappointed me. Maybe if I would have gone in a little more ignorant I would have enjoyed it more.

Greg Baty

Greg is a lifelong genre film fan who digs boobs, blood and beer. He also enjoys old school punk rock, comic books and spending time with his beautiful wife Ellen and his cats Sydney and Alabama. Greg is the webmaster, Editor in Chief and Head Writer for Cinesploitation.

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