Saw V (2008 Review)
Director: David Hackl
Cast: Tobin Bell, Costas Mandylor, Scott Patterson, Betsy Russell, Julie Benz, Meagan Good
Twisted Pictures / Color / Rated R / Widescreen (1.85:1) / English / 88 mins
Every year, the weekend before Halloween, something magical occurs for gore hounds all around the world; Lionsgate and Twisted Pictures unleashes another blood soaked sequel in the Saw franchise. For me and others akin to me, it’s a holiday like no other. These movies aren’t meant to be the spookiest or arty or even original. They aren’t meant to be teen-scream friendly. They are here to show you the diseased minds of their creators. Machines and contraptions of mutilation and death are the main course with a good helping of tension on the side. And to top it all off, the demented twist ending that will surely leave you wanting more, and more and more…
Agent Strahm and Detective Hoffman are the only survivors of the last Jigsaw murder rampage in which he dies. The only problem is, Strahm was also supposed to die and Hoffman, who works for Jigsaw (as we saw in IV) was supposed to be the hero who stopped the serial killer. In a cat and mouse game between the two, Strahm tries to put the pieces together and link Hoffman to the killings and the killer while Hoffman switches up the original plan to now frame the FBI agent for all of the murders. Meanwhile, other facets of the new killer’s plan are in motion…
Five people wake up together in a dank, dirty room tied to one another, literally and figuratively. They all must figure out how they are linked and work together to escape one room to get to the next and hopefully eventually find a way out. The only problem is, they are all very selfish people who are being tested because they all, in some way, took advantage of their positions in life to steal, manipulate, lie and even murder. Can they work together to free themselves and win “Jigsaw’s” warped game of rehabilitation? How many will escape, if any? How will both story lines converge to make another shocking ending in the latest entry from the Godfather of Torture Porn?
Over the last 5 years, the franchise has had its ups and downs. The first Saw was one of the most original, brutal and surprising horror movies of all time. From there, they built on the mythos, most of the time keeping up the tradition (Saw II and IV), and other times faltering (Saw III). This time they didn’t just falter, Twisted Pictures may have crippled their entire cash cow. Up to this point the third sequel was the worst, but this one so far exceeds three’s suck-i-tude, that it doesn’t deserve to be part of the pie. It’s a watered down mess that turns out to be a half-assed mystery/thriller with very little gore and violence thrown in to pass it off as its namesake.
The two story lines had little, if really anything, to do with each other. The kills, including the first which is usually the most intense, were all tame even compared to some PG-13 bullshit that is passed off as “horror”. A pendulum? Come on, didn’t that go out of style with the Spanish Inquisition? Explosions? Electrocutions? Lame. The movie’s only wince inducing scenes were toward the end with 2 of the players forcing their hands on an electric buzzsaw blade and a full bodied smash-o-rama. Even those examples are relatively domestic compared to the onscreen atrocities of the first four movies. I will close the review by giving Lionsgate and Twisted Pictures an ultimatum: Step it up next year, boys, or you will lose the respect of Cinesploitation and its bajillion readers!
